Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Why Do People Get Divorced? The Main Reasons For Divorce


This article will explore the most common reasons for divorce and attempt to answer the question 'Why do people get divorced?'
If you know the most common reasons, you can act on them and potentially avoid a divorce or breakup. A marriage - or long term relationship (I'll be assuming a marriage throughout this article, but many of the exact same factors apply to long-term relationships as well) - that is in trouble will exhibit certain warning signs. Barring some type of abuse going on, almost any marriage can be saved with enough knowledge (if you act on that knowledge).
One common reason for divorce is infidelity. Studies estimate that as many as 80% of marriages will have at least one partner commit adultery during the course of the marriage. This of course is a major problem, and requires a lot of work to get through. Once someone is caught cheating, the trust can be lost forever, and the hurt will never go away.
Another of the major reasons for divorce is a breakdown in communication. If one or the other is not communicating, or shunning the other, or the two can't talk together without fighting, obviously there's a major problem going on.
Many studies and academics claim that money problems are one of the leading causes of divorce. If times are tough, or one partner is upset with the other for either not contributing financially, or not being responsible (or respectful) of a budget, this can snowball into a huge problem. When money is scarce, a lot of the every-day issues can blow up into big fights.
Another leading reason for divorce is sexual incompatibility. If one partner shuts out the other, or if one simply isn't getting their needs met, this not only causes major frustration, but is one of the biggest reasons someone will go out and have an affair. These issues definitely need to be worked out - sometimes with the help of a therapist, sometimes simply by acknowledging and making an effort to meet the other person's needs - or a divorce may be imminent.
Simple negativity is, in my opinion, one of the absolute most important reasons for divorce. What I mean by negativity is what others would term 'nagging' or being demeaning, insulting, or negative in general. If someone can't stand being around their spouse because they are constantly being belittled or simply because they feel unappreciated, this is a doomed relationship unless things drastically change, and fast.
Abuse - physical or mental - is another of the main causes of divorce. In this case, a divorce and a complete separation from the other person is the best case of action. I don't care how many other factors are involved, if abuse is going on, the abused partner needs to get out of there as soon as possible - abuse only escalates, it never disappears mystically on its own.
Unless there's abuse going on, almost all of the above problems can be solved. If people educate themselves - don't try to go off how you 'think' relationships work, educate yourself - there is no reason why almost any marriage or relationship can't be saved. None of these issues other than abuse is a death sentence for a marriage, and although these are the most common reasons for divorce, almost every problem can be overcome with enough knowledge and effort.


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